I picked out one of the trendiest bags around at the time, I had been eyeing it off for weeks. It didn't looked like a baby bag, more of a sophisticated beach bag which I would be happy to put my phone and wallet in and away we go.
Yes, the bag stayed in pristine condition whilst I did fit in some shopping trips in those first few months. However I did spend a lot of my retail therapy time in the mother's room feeding and changing my baby. As the weeks turned into months the sleeping princess also liked to be awake more and not in a peaceful state either but screaming her lungs out. So the baby pouch was used to maximize shopping time and the new pram became more of a trolley to wheel around the purchases I managed to make.
The bags contents also had to ramped up and was taken everywhere, because now we had food and bottles to take on every outing, as well as three spare changes of clothes for baby, one for myself, cloth nappies and handtowels to mop up all of the projectile spills my very spuey baby regularly had, toys, a floor mat for her to lay on, panadol for those terrible times of teething, immunisations and some little colds.
"Be Prepared" My old Girl Guide motto - I have to say that this bag was full if not overflowing with all the equipment I could possibly need. It was a little on the heavy side but I was never really caught out in the event of a nappy blowout or a hungry or sick baby.
Being my first bub I really never left her side for the first 3 months. BIG MISTAKE! By the time I was going to make my first outing without my baby and the "equipment bag" to a concert where I would be away for really not a long time, maybe four hours; I was a nervous wreck! I felt guilty, I knew I wouldn't be around to feed her and I wouldn't be able to just come home either. I squeezed into some pre-pregnancy clothes for this first evening away and I grabbed my wallet and phone. The outing was a success and my husband coped fine - I really had unnecessarily worried.
I guess looking back now I make this conclusion. It is healthy for new mums to take a little time out. I would say I definitely took too long to take that time away - just a few hours. It was harder to take this time out because I took so long to do it. Whilst I was going to plenty of mothers groups, shopping and catching up with my family, I always had my baby and "equipment bag" no matter where I went. Don't get me wrong I loved being a mum but should have taken some time for small pleasures such as a haircut, waxing or even a hot choccy! I really didn't extend my social activities outside of being a mum until my baby was 7 months. I made it too easy to take her with me everywhere instead of getting my partner to share some of the responsibility. I started heading out on my own and having more regular catchups with friends in the evenings, getting back out to dinner, coffee or a movie and this changed my whole outlook on my little domestic world. I definitely think that keeping your handbag is one of the ways to retain your little piece of independance. On the practical side you can leave on the run, without reefing all of your items out of you baby bag, and your partner can have the kids at home or head out with the "baby bag". (there are some great unisex designs) On the metaphorical side you may be a mum (I know it's not as simple as just a handbag) BUT you are still a women of the world and need to get out and experience life and do a few things that you enjoy whether it be alone, with your partner or friends.
The second time around with baby number 2 I kept both my handbag and my baby bag and had social activities which allowed me to head out of the house with friends much earlier than the seven month mark. I wasn't out every night of the week but a few nights a month where I enjoyed some adult conversation. I am a lot happier as a 2nd time mum, my life seems to have more balance. (check out my post "Life Culture Shock" for more on this topic for first time mums)
Apart from finding a forgotten sandwich in the bag, or even worse a bottle filled with milk or a stray sultana I love my baby bag - but I love my handbag too.
Check out http://www.oioi.com.au/
for a great selection of baby bags. I chose one of the messenger styles you can see below and it is still going strong after nearly 4 years of use!
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